Saturday 14 July 2018

Game changer... they could be right.

Electric skateboards, or E-boards as they are known are not new. In fact I had the electric ex-skate years and years ago. Didn't get that much use due to its weight and the fact that it (by law at the time apparently) had a really, really annoying noise as you were opening the throttle. But after finding my plans to commute by bike weren't going to happen, due to it aggravating/locking my meniscus damaged knee, I began looking at the E-boards as maybe a valid alternative.

However, pavements (sidewalks) over here are usually very rough, made of paving slabs that rise and fall, roads are full of potholes and in London, full of crazy assed drivers. The thought of getting stopped dead by any of these is bad enough on my normal surf-skate, it happening at 20mph+ on an E-board didn't really appeal.

I had been following the life of the 'Onewheel' since its inception, through the Kickstarter phase on onto the release of the '+' version. Obviously, as I am a gadget geek it had always intrigued me but the price (well really the hassle and cost of shipping it from the US) and the fact it was kinda touted as 'snowboarding' on asphalt and grass had always just stopped me from getting one. But the thought was always there. So, what the fuck is a Onewheel?


Basically it is an awesome piece of tech that brings meaning to the word 'float'. I don't begin to understand the tech and engineering behind this one any more so then Marty understood the flux capacitor. Nor do I need to... All I need to know is the stoke that rises when 'floating'. Not the most imaginative name (I would like to think they were being trite on purpose when they named it) and not the most beautiful piece of kit in the world... But who gives a fuck? One ride and you are hooked, seriously I have had no one not want another go yet (unless they Bart - more of that later - and even then most come crawling back).

OWs handle most terrain you can throw at them, yeh you have to be damn good to take on a mountain bike trail, extremely lucky or rich to get them on the waterline at the beach (stay in the hard bit dudes) and probably an idiot to take on standing water - but if you want it will oblige. On flat smooth surfaces they are awesome - but so are E-boards. It's on other terrain that the OW becomes sublime - those cracks, sticks, bumps, gravel patches etc don't count as deathtraps any more. Grassy banks you used to stare at as you skated past now become overhead glassy point break waves, that golf course at night becomes a Whistler Resort powder run... Grassy banks are now like finding out the points are firing and everyone but you has to be at work!

Here is a clip of Adam from the Voice of Onewheel (TTR studios) demonstrating what I mean.
Adam 'strapping it on'

Don't get me wrong the OW is not a forgiving anyone can 'send it' machine, ridden safely it is a pussy cat... Push it, ignore the board and it is a hungry tiger that just found you tied up and smeared in honey (not sure if it would give a shit about the honey, that is just my Love Island dream - but you get the point).


Riders can add fenders - not a choice I am going to make but they can help you avoid shoes full of shit - literally if you don't see the dog poop ahead...


There is a built in mechanic which tells one when you are pushing the motor/machine too hard and it is about to bite you - this is called 'pushback'. What happens is the OW will raise the nose, pushing down the back, which if you listen to the warning will slow you down. This will happen at time when you are pushing it, accelerating up hill too quick, expecting the same power as normal with a low battery charge, but mainly happens at 15mph to show you are close to the recommended top speed of 19mph. Now one can go faster (a lot faster) but then don't moan when you do a BART (yep a normal dude has become a legend and a VERB - why? Look no further BART

Trouble is a lot of variables will contribute to the eventual, 'Hey you should have listened smart ass, I am chucking you off', moment the motor will shut off - surface, incline, torque being used (how heavy you are), temperature etc etc so you may never get the same results every time. Bottom line is you listen to the board and cool it a bit, or you push it like a true adrenaline junkie and pay the price at some point. It's a free world out there on the whole - do whichever you like, just don't moan and blame the one wheel when it happens. And certainly don't chastise and judge people who like to push it. Being of an 'ripe' age I am not going to be pushing it anymore (been there, done that) but kudos to those who do. 


Add ons abound for the OW - take your pick. I'm too old for the flight fins (in the 70's we did the same with our skateboards using bike inner tubes), don't care for a fender (bring on the gravel marks in my legs its a tribal marking of the OW tribe) but will put float plates on in the hope of someday sliding a curb (not likely to be honest) or at least adding protection to the delicate underbelly of my beloved. 


Instruction on how to ride can be found online and I certainly can not add anything useful to that. But here are some things I would have liked to have known before stepping on...

  • If you ride without pads then that is cool with me (freedom of choice at play) but I would definitely wear good wrist guards. I think one is not likely to fall backwards on the whole, but being catapulted frontwards will happen at some point and those wrists will suffer without them. 
  • Feel the Pushback Luke - and then fuckin well take notice. Even if you push through it and go faster at least you will know you are living on the edge. Not knowing what the PB is and just not caring and pushing through it is the number one cause of doing a BART.
  • Whatever you do DON'T step off with the back foot first - you will do an engine assisted split from hell! Learn the heel lift or foot roll method of disengaging the sensor on the front pad. Or jump off double footed. 
  • Resign yourself to the fact you will be watching youtube clips of people just boringly floating along with their dogs during work hours - or as I like to see them the hours you have to do before an evening float. 
  • Get a handle for the bastard thing (it will be a BASTARD THING as soon a you have to do the walk of shame for the first time as you ran out of juice) as it is a lot comfier to lug about with one. 
  • Solution to above point - BUY and XR as your legs will fail before the battery. 
Lastly join the 'inner crew' and listen to the Voice of Onewheel over at TTR studios with 



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